Some of you need to learn how to troll...so heres a guide!Follow

Pointless Troll Guide 1.1

This guide is mainly in respone to Kojiechun, only because he thinks hes a good troll. This may or may not help anyone out in the future, but its 6am, I'm having relationship problems, so I'm bored and cannot sleep. This is not a friday topic because I say it not.

Being a Troll vs. Being an Idiot

Now before you start "trolling it up" you need to ask yourself, are you a witty, enteraining person, or were you dropped on your head a few times when you were a baby. If you awnser yes to the first question, then please troll on, make some entertaining friday post maybe, have a good time on the Asylum, whatever. If you said you were an idiot, hmmm make topic after topic about how you can't get a Moldearring? Somethign like that.

How to begin

Now you have to pick a name, now remember you cannot use your real FFXI name, or your server, this'll allow people to figure out when you are lying too easily. You have to make them work at it. Pick a name, and then suck up to people and get rated up, best place for that is Feedback forum, make some helpful suggestions just enough to get ya scholar status.

Getting your name out there

Now you'll want to start out with some really good flame post to get things going. Try something about how japanesse players are better then english players. Make up stuff about getting chain7 for 350 EXP in what sounds like a very standard party. You arent just selling the troll topic, you are saying yourself. Making it sound like you are a super elitist can pay off huge later. Keep points to remember when being a "japophile" is that jpn players don't like to be checked, and never check anyone without asking. Also ofcourse that a JPN Bommeranger is the highest DD job in the game.

Making the perfect topic

Now after everyone has figured out that you are some type of JPN loving elitest, its time to make the perfect topic for flame. Topic is very important, you need to get enough respone to make people reply and fight with eachother. Some key topic are "bandwagon jobs, sushi vs meat" and ofcourse my favorite "I only party with JPN players, I tell them to check me to see who 1337 I am, so they don't care I dont speak japanesse" Long title I know, but I've seen it used very effectively.

SubtleBlow

Now heres where we seperate the man and the guys readying and copying this guide. After you have started a good flame, its time to use that scholar status you worked on. Now go and rate down everyone who disagreed with you. You'll get some flames from people who don't like getting rated down. After that dies down rate down everyone who agreed with you, now they flame and ***** about thier karma. Now to top it all out, make a claim, and don't back it up at all. Say something like for sushi vs meat "I only party with people who use Red Curry, everything else is crap, I pay for my damage, so should you. Hell I spend more then rangers, so I'm pretty then you". That'll make some people just go mad, and should get ya up to atleast 2 pages of flame.

When people start calling you a troll

There comes a time when people start to figure it out that you are a troll, when this happens its time to make upstanding post, be very nice and helpful, so to confuse the general public. So you can live to troll again.


Yeah you all can rate me down now if ya want, it really doesnt matter in the least. I don't take this post seriously, so whatever happens to it doesnt really matter to me.

Edited, Fri Oct 14 06:11:57 2005 by HunterGamma

You also might wanna add that yo0u shouldn't make a character profile on Alla.



No, Spinshark's whole "You're all japanophiles" argument is lame, compared to the "My job is better than your job" threads, where people doctor screenshots and make up outrageos parser numbers to fit their claim.

Those are always the most entertaining. Anyone remember Clicker's "DRG suck" thread that went for 28-30 pages?

Meh...whatever. At 7:45 in the morning the last thing on my mind is a bunch of karma trolls in a "karma troll guide" thread.

Edited, Fri Oct 14 07:53:32 2005 by Erawyn

This is the worst guide for trolling I've ever seen. "Attention ***** 101" is far more fitting.

You suck at the internet.

**** off half the globe AND CNN, and then get back to me kthx.

Edit: Pssst, http://www.gnaa.us


Edited, Fri Oct 14 12:55:24 2005 by Auritribe

What happened rhiana... for a few weeks you were actually pretty civil and seemed like you were past this. But now you're back to spitting venom at anyone who looks at you funny. I liked you better when you were nice. :(

People feel their need to take their digs in on me and call me a troll for defending new players is where it started. They wanted a troll and they are getting one. No good deed goes unpunished on these forums. We have the Holier then thou asylum twats to thank for that. GTFO and go play EQ you EQ rejects.. If you hate FFXIers so much, why do you post on our main forum...


And I am a nice person, when people don't treat me with disrespect. >:(

opps'd again.



Edited, Fri Oct 14 17:21:26 2005 by rhianaowns

http://img437.imageshack.us/img437/1700/92050720050516screen0151mn.jpg

Actually I loved this guide... rate up... =P

the thing that's really pathetic is the way some people suck up to the trolls to get on their "good side" ...yeah, like Trolls have a good side? Pssss...

Peace out

Meh it's not that difficult to get their attention. Miniature riots for cheap laptops, the WOW poison virus...They'll take anything on a slow news day and I don't think that pissing them off is all that hard.