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#5277 Jul 02 2018 at 8:09 AM Rating: Good
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Little kids mowing lawns always get cops called on them.
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#5278 Jul 02 2018 at 8:30 AM Rating: Excellent
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Shit, I need some kids mowing lawns around here and I don't care what race they are. Last year when my mower was busted, I called like five lawn services out of Craigslist; three never returned my calls and the two guys who quoted prices wanted $70 for the job. I actually tried to hire one of them and he still flaked on me and never showed up.

Send me all the illegal immigrant black Muslim kids from Nigeria without business permits you want if they'll mow my lawn for $20.

Edited, Jul 2nd 2018 9:31am by Jophiel
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#5279 Jul 02 2018 at 8:36 AM Rating: Good
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lolgaxe wrote:
Little kids mowing lawns always get cops called on them.

In this particular case it seems that this may be (somewhat) true. Articles I read had quotes from the person who called the cops. The disputes between these neighbors had apparently been going on for some time. Almost half a dozen cop calls against her? That their relationship is so poor that they use the police for all interactions rather than confront them. That the cops were called to deal with the neighbor rather than the child specifically. Or as the woman put it, she didn't call the cops on the child, but on the "garbage" neighbor. (She referred to the woman as garbage in the quote). Previous disputes including things like them parking on their lawn and not moving when asked.
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#5280 Jul 02 2018 at 9:19 AM Rating: Excellent
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All that extra paperwork must be the only thing that keeps cops from pepper spraying everyone involved in a situation like that. The temptation to misuse the stuff must be crazy.

Edited, Jul 2nd 2018 8:28am by someproteinguy
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#5281 Jul 03 2018 at 8:37 AM Rating: Good
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Siri told me Stan Lee died yesterday.

I threw my iPhone at the wall, since it lied to me considering Stan Lee is an immortal energy vampire living off the energy of artists and writers like Frank Miller. I've spent the last hour explaining to the quartermaster why I need a new one, which is a lot more difficult when the only reason you can think of is "because it's a job requirement" and don't really want one to begin with.
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George Carlin wrote:
I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
#5282 Jul 03 2018 at 4:11 PM Rating: Decent
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Well, that's what you get for using Siri in the first place. Just because you have to use an iPhone for work does not mean that you have to use that stupid assistant program.
#5283 Jul 03 2018 at 4:13 PM Rating: Good
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Mine doesn't even have Siri, as far as I know. An old iPhone 5. It doesn't talk to me or listen to my voice at all.
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#5284 Jul 03 2018 at 4:57 PM Rating: Decent
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TirithRR wrote:
It doesn't talk to me or listen to my voice at all.

And you let it get away with that insolence?
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publiusvarus wrote:
we all know liberals are well adjusted american citizens who only want what's best for society. While conservatives are evil money grubbing scum who only want to sh*t on the little man and rob the world of its resources.
#5285 Jul 03 2018 at 7:09 PM Rating: Good
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Debalic wrote:
TirithRR wrote:
It doesn't talk to me or listen to my voice at all.

And you let it get away with that insolence?


QUIET! They'll hear you! Are you trying to start trouble?
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Dandruffshampoo wrote:
Curses, beaten by Professor stupidopo-opo.
Annabella, Goblin in Disguise wrote:
Stupidmonkey is more organized than a bag of raccoons.
#5286 Jul 05 2018 at 7:17 AM Rating: Good
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I'm pretty sure my Siri was getting an attitude from all the times I've insulted it. Probably good I broke it before it went full Skynet.
____________________________
George Carlin wrote:
I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
#5287 Jul 05 2018 at 11:25 AM Rating: Excellent
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Went out and did my 'Murica for the day. No one seemed to be able to stay on the bulls, but plenty of excitement nonetheless. We got home super late and the kids weren't much into waking up at 5:00am this morning (or was I). Still fun was had.
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#5288 Jul 06 2018 at 7:43 AM Rating: Good
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We blew up part of Long Island. Figured no one would miss it.
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George Carlin wrote:
I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
#5289 Jul 11 2018 at 11:17 AM Rating: Good
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I won't be voting Democratic ever again:

https://townhall.com/columnists/erichreimer/2018/07/09/the-walkaway-movement-is-taking-america-by-storm-n2498426

For I have seen the light. So many of my fellow Americans have wished me to just agree with them on everything SO HARD that their sheer will has steered me towards the path of righteousness. The same is true for all people. As of this day and every day after, we are all to grow okra on our family farm in Tennessee and refer to Jophiel as "Jophed." We are to forgo any notion of having a sense of humor and are now afraid of everything. We will condemn education and the common interests of humanity in favor of our new masters, and relinquish them of any sort of responsibility.

Edited, Jul 11th 2018 5:19pm by Kuwoobie
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#5290 Jul 11 2018 at 3:10 PM Rating: Decent
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Kuwoobie wrote:
I won't be voting Democratic ever again:

https://townhall.com/columnists/erichreimer/2018/07/09/the-walkaway-movement-is-taking-america-by-storm-n2498426

For I have seen the light. So many of my fellow Americans have wished me to just agree with them on everything SO HARD that their sheer will has steered me towards the path of righteousness. The same is true for all people. As of this day and every day after, we are all to grow okra on our family farm in Tennessee and refer to Jophiel as "Jophed." We are to forgo any notion of having a sense of humor and are now afraid of everything. We will condemn education and the common interests of humanity in favor of our new masters, and relinquish them of any sort of responsibility.

Yes! ***** the Dems! The party that courts minorities and gays for votes and only pays lip service to progressive ideals! Let's join the party that actually consists of *****, racists and conversion therapists instead!


Edited, Jul 11th 2018 5:18pm by Debalic
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publiusvarus wrote:
we all know liberals are well adjusted american citizens who only want what's best for society. While conservatives are evil money grubbing scum who only want to sh*t on the little man and rob the world of its resources.
#5291 Jul 11 2018 at 6:36 PM Rating: Good
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So. Amazon just went down.

co.jp is still alive, but it seems like... 10 minutes ago, everything else died.

Instead of spending a bunch of money on stuff you don't really need all the time, you can look at pictures of dogs. (one of those "clever" 503 pages. The Dogs of Amazon.)


So the World hasn't ended. Seems it's only the front page to the World. Gotta have links to the correct spots to get to view things like your account page, etc.

Edit:
Well, that was uneventful. Seems the ordeal is over now. I was hoping it'd be something spectacular to come of it. Revelations of Amazon being an elaborate hoax and they just packed up and stole it all. Or Aliens. It was Aliens.

Edit2:
On a side note, I am about a quarter of the way thru the second book of the Reality Dysfunction. Seems well worth it. Only real complaint is some really bad editing. No pauses between chapters. Switches between the multiple storylines happen instantly. You have to pay attention closely to catch them, and until you can recall all the different storylines, you'll be a paragraph into another story before you realize they are talking about something else. First half of the first book my "back 30 seconds" button got a lot of use as I said "WTF is going on?"

And a short time after I cancelled my Audible renewal... Amazon sends em a link saying "3 months of 5 dollars per month". Now I'm going to sign up again. *sigh*.

Edited, Jul 11th 2018 9:23pm by TirithRR
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#5292 Jul 11 2018 at 9:24 PM Rating: Decent
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Kuwoobie wrote:
We are to forgo any notion of having a sense of humor and are now afraid of everything. We will condemn education and the common interests of humanity in favor of our new masters, and relinquish them of any sort of responsibility.


I thought this was about leaving the Democratic party. Sounds to me like you're describing the exact sort of inflexible social ideology that's driving people away from the Dems. When the most common method of dealing with disputes is to declare that someone is either 100% in agreement with you, or is irredeemably evil, there's not a whole lot of wiggle room to work with.
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#5293 Jul 11 2018 at 11:14 PM Rating: Excellent
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Townhall masturbation aside, there's no exodus from the Democratic party. Democratic party affiliation is about average (GOP affiliation is near a record low) and adding in Democratic leaners puts it as high as it's been in a long while.

"A guy on a Facebook page said he left the Democrats so oh no!" is about as meaningful as "George Will said we should all vote Democratic this year!" except that you maybe know who George Will is.
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#5294 Jul 11 2018 at 11:24 PM Rating: Good
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gbaji wrote:
Kuwoobie wrote:
We are to forgo any notion of having a sense of humor and are now afraid of everything. We will condemn education and the common interests of humanity in favor of our new masters, and relinquish them of any sort of responsibility.


I thought this was about leaving the Democratic party. Sounds to me like you're describing the exact sort of inflexible social ideology that's driving people away from the Dems. When the most common method of dealing with disputes is to declare that someone is either 100% in agreement with you, or is irredeemably evil, there's not a whole lot of wiggle room to work with.


That sounds so liberal. That's the new blanket term I use for everything I don't like because I don't know what anything is. I literally think Communism, Fascism and Socialism are all the same thing. They're all a bunch of scary sounding words with negative stigma attached to them and that's all I care to know. I'm a real American now. Killary Klinton is going to lose again in 2020! I won't fall for any loony liberal logic any longer! #WalkAway!

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Galkaman wrote:
Kuwoobie will die crushed under the burden of his mediocrity.

#5295 Jul 12 2018 at 7:31 AM Rating: Good
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gbaji wrote:
I thought this was about leaving the Democratic party.
That would be the first sign you made a mistake somewhere.
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George Carlin wrote:
I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
#5296 Jul 15 2018 at 12:15 PM Rating: Excellent
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.

Edited, Jul 15th 2018 1:15pm by Jophiel
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#5297 Jul 15 2018 at 12:46 PM Rating: Decent
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This place dead yet or still full of all the same jerk offs I used to talk to about stupid **** we actually don't care about?

Also how the **** do i close this stupid zam article box **** me.

Edited, Jul 15th 2018 2:48pm by rdmcandie
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#5298 Jul 15 2018 at 1:35 PM Rating: Excellent
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rdmcandie wrote:
This place dead yet

Yes.

Fun Fact: I updated Android on my tablet yesterday and had to reinstall my browsers, etc. Didn't bother pinning a bookmark to Zam this time.
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
#5299 Jul 15 2018 at 6:44 PM Rating: Good
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I can not verify the veracity of the "fact" portions of that statement, I can with great certainty say that no, it was not fun. Not for us. It's not always about you, Joph.
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Dandruffshampoo wrote:
Curses, beaten by Professor stupidopo-opo.
Annabella, Goblin in Disguise wrote:
Stupidmonkey is more organized than a bag of raccoons.
#5300 Jul 15 2018 at 7:29 PM Rating: Decent
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Also Joph that gun training is fantastic, reminds me of wondershowzen.
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#5301 Jul 15 2018 at 7:31 PM Rating: Excellent
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Professor stupidmonkey wrote:
I can not verify the veracity of the "fact" portions of that statement, I can with great certainty say that no, it was not fun. Not for us. It's not always about you, Joph.

Maybe you read it wrong.
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Belkira wrote:
Wow. Regular ol' Joph fan club in here.
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